on discipline

I have read what feels like a gazillion parenting books, but the best lesson I ever got in being an effective mom was watching Shamu, the killer whale, at Sea World last year. Shamu did the most amazing jumps, slides and whirls, and every single time he did something, his trainers shoved buckets of fish into his mouth. I find with my own two willful boys that all the yelling, screaming, threatening and promising I can muster never holds up to instant rewards when they do something good. We've known since Pavlov that the brain can associate information, like a ringing bell, with rewards. I'm working on getting my boys to start drooling when I say, "Do the dishes!"

And speaking of varieties of tough love, does anyone out there not agree that Cindy Sheehan, described in this recent NY Times story, deserves an award? I look at pictures of her, alone in her t-shirt and jeans and sunburn and grief, outside Pres. Bush's vacation compound, and am in grateful awe.